When more love is trying to come in than we are ready or willing to receive, then the outer love is greater than the inner love. Someone can love you more than you love yourself, so you have to open to that love which means you grow. And vice verca.
You may want to love someone else more than you currently love yourself, so this also forces you to open because you have to open to loving yourself more, in order love another more. So, outer union is an opportunity to challenge and be challenged into deeper love.
We are never taught how to keep opening to giving and receiving more love - and it's scary! The more 'open' we become, the more vulnerable we are to being hurt. As much as we would like, we can never trust or expect anyone to always be there for us and love us unconditionally. At any given time, the beloved's destiny may take them away from us. They could die or meet someone else that they are meant to be with. Less extreme, they may have a bad day, a bad week or their shadows may come up in a way that makes them emotionally unavailable.
What we can do however, is trust ourselves. We can trust ourselves enough to hold our own masculine CENTRE and keep our feminine hearts OPEN even when it hurts. We can trust our INNER marriage. And in times where we lose our way, the stretch is to look at where we have betrayed ourselves, rather than focusing on where someone else has betrayed us. This is where Eliyah comes in.
Through our private marriage counselling service and relationship counselling service we will take you through a process of feeling your inner marriage, so an authentic outer marriage can become manifest.
When we come from the full cup of our inner marriage, we can be a 'brother' to our beloved and a 'sister' in difficult times, rather than feeling betrayed that they can't show up for us. When we focus on trusting ourselves, we are more concerned with what we can give rather than what we can get.
How is Eliyah's marriage counselling and relationship counselling different to any other couple sessions that are available?
Old Model, New Model and Eliyah's Model
Eliyah is all about the middle path of relating, where it's not the old co-dependent paradigm of our parents and our grandparents, and it’s not the new sovereign paradigm which has more recently come into vogue - its’ a dance in the middle.
The 'old paradigm' is of being co-dependant i.e. "let’s pay off a mortgage together and die".
The 'sovereign new paradigm' is of being independent - "I follow MY path irrespective of how it impacts others".
The middle path of relating is a third option, inter-dependancy, and is somewhere in the middle.
The older paradigm values safety.
And the new paradigm values freedom.
The old paradigm is like one circle.
The new paradigm is like two circles.
The middle path is a two circles coming together to form an infinity symbol - on their way together and alone.